Thursday, February 02, 2006

Über Christ Follower Ken Graves


One of my favorite speakers at the Calvary Chapel SE Pastors’ Conference was a pastor from Bangor, Maine, by the name of Ken Graves.

Ken has these huge arms, a deep, baritone voice, and an incredible ability to deliver the Word of God. In a church culture that wants to tame, feminize, and neuter men, Ken is a breath of fresh air. He makes us men feel like its okay to be a man. A John Wayne kind of man. A Clint Eastwood kind of man. A Gladiator kind of man. A Chuck Norris kind of man.

My friend, Chris Goeppner, posted a list on his blog about the manliness of Chuck Norris. I thought it would be fun to switch out Norris’s name and insert Ken’s:

1. Ken Graves' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever.
2. Ken Graves does not sleep. He waits.
3. Ken Graves is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
4. The chief export of Ken Graves is pain.
5. If you can see Ken Graves, he can see you. If you can't see Ken Graves, you may be only seconds away from death.
6. Ken Graves has counted to infinity. Twice.
7. Ken Graves does not hunt because the word hunting implies the probability of failure. Ken Graves goes killing.
8. The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Ken Graves out. It failed miserably.
9. A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Ken Graves and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
10. In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Ken Graves, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
11. There is no chin behind Ken Graves' beard. There is only another fist.

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

...ok this is probably not appropriate but if you had a preacher death match who would win between Ken Graves and Jon Courson?

Jeff T. said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Dude, do you have a man crush on Ken Graves?

Anonymous said...

Hi my name is Jessica Graves.. Yeah thats my dad your talking about. And I guess Im just lost as to why grown men like your self are taking all this time do put somthing like this together? Maybe your time and energy could be better spent O I dont know.. Doing anything other then this.

Bryonm said...

Wow! Jessica, thanks for checking in. Your dad is one of my heroes. Everyday, all over the country, people search the internet to find stuff out about your dad. Alot of guys look up to him. You're a lucky young lady :)

Anonymous said...

I have to agree with Jessica also there seems to be a sense that some of the things you are saying comes across as either jealousy or bitter. I have stood and talked with Ken when he was at Calvary Chapel Chino valley and I would say yes he is a man's man, but he is real and very humble and compassionate.I'm think we need to be manly men the same as our saviour.I'm not talking arrogant and fleshly,nor is Ken Graves that way. Passionate about the TRUTH, you better believe it! Ken isn't afraid to speak out on the truth found in God's word! Pray to the Lord we could find more pastors and men like him, better yet let us be them men. God knows we need more in these apostate times we live in! Let us be about bringing people to Christ and being who HE wants us to be!!

Troy Love - Southern California

Bryonm said...

ouch.

snarky - yes. bitter - heck, no.

well maybe there is a little hair envy. he has great hair and since i'm a man that's suffered from male pattern balding since i was 23, i do get a little jealous of guys that are both studly and godly. so i guess you nailed me. thanks for calling me out, bro'.

Anonymous said...

If you like Ken and he is one of your heros, Stand and point to Jesus Christ, not Ken.

Bryonm said...

We need faithful heroes in life. Ken is an example of a man's man. Since you are near him geographically, you should go and learn from him...

Anonymous said...

I have to be honest, I just don't get it when it comes to Ken. I saw him at a recent mens' conference. At this conference, he liked to call names, and then hide behind the mantle of "speaking the truth" when questioned on it, even going so far as to attack in response. I certainly didn't see this as an "Uber" follower of Christ. Rather, Ken sets the example for me of what I don't want to be in my Christian walk. He left a very bad taste in my mouth. I think you're better off following the carpenter than the "manly, studly" lumberjack.

God's child said...

I attended Calvary for 7 years under Ken. I find from my own experience that all of your comments are very accurate of him. He is definitely a very strong man who takes his role as man and provider VERY seriously. He also is very gentle nuturing with wisdom and insight. He stands strong upon God's Word and teaches with an amazing capability. And finally he is human. He does tend to badmouth people to make his own points. He is very opinionated and sometimes brushes his own opinions under the Bible. Personally, these things about him caused me to leave the church; however, he is gifted, loves the Lord and is human. Instead of idolizing him and puffing that ego of his up, perhaps you should consider just praying for him. He has many people he is accountable to God for and he needs you to pray for him and look to Christ, not Him, for your example.

Anonymous said...

ken graves should not be admired as much as he is. his sermons lack theological substance and instead are filled with charismatic anecdotes, evangelical rhetoric, and bashing people he disagrees with.

Anonymous said...

Do you know how he evangelizes? He goes into bars and offers the patrons a challenge: if they can beat him in wrestling, their drinks are on him for the night; but if they lose, then they have to come to his church the next Sunday. They usually hold up their end; and he has never lost.

He also carries his Bible in a holster.

Bryonm said...

He challenged the phys. ed. coach at Calvary Chapel Fort Lauderdale and got his butt handed to him in a lunch bag :) But he was man enough to talk about it and laugh at himself.

The bible in a holster never worked for me. kind of corny.

Anonymous said...

Dude, none of those comments are serious. I doubt any of the people who have posted here are serious about all that stuff (all those things were originally about chuck Norris(who doesn't like those comments either, being a Christian). I know that Ken doesn't get puffed up by this stuff. I got to ride in a van with Him for a few hours and pick his brain about ministry. That man has a huge heart. God has molded him into a humble servant. He might be a little bold, but he's also humble in a certain way. He's gone into the African jungles in danger of own life, and he might seem really uber manly, but God has used him to do some rally awesome things for His Glory. Also God has used the grappling ministry that ken has in a more practical way. He talked about a couple of times where God has put him in the path of people who are running from the police, or those who would be shortly. He was able to stop a man that had stabbed someone to death, and another rime where some guys came to his house by mistake looking for drugs. The cops got involved shortly after and Ken was able to take down the biggest guy until he got him to submit. Both times, he was able to share the gospel with these guys,who would have never been able to be approached by anyone who wasn't as brave as ken. But we all have our faults, whis is covered by grace daily. Also, God has made people differently than one another and has created a different mission for each of us. We arn't called to do the exact same things ken, so why should you criticize the way he does what God has called him to? I think the problem is that the majority of people who are "fans" of ken have made this image of him that doesn't exactly match up with the real Ken. His ministries have been effective for his area, and His love for people really shines through.

Anonymous said...

ken is a good man and pastor. i got to know him at seven oaks training center in maine. its a rehab discipleship program. a part of his ministry. i left after three months but it was a life experiance. i attended his church three times a week while there and much knowledge was gained.

Anonymous said...

RESPONSE TO NATHAN:
I can verify all of that!
Ive seen the bible holster..

Unknown said...

PS. on Pastor Ken getting beat In FTL.... That guys Name is Steve and he was an Olympian...

Anonymous said...

I listened to one podcast from him (forgive me if I misrepresent) and came to the conclusion that he preaches/teaches hard and straight forward (which I happen to enjoy due to it being in relation to my personality and need to be rebuked). It does seem though that some of the things he says are quite dramatically put and he seems (based on my current knowledge of him) to lack emphasis on theology. Anyway, wonderful man of God. Check out Matt Slick, he has a similar bulldog trait as well as an excellent knowledge on the Bible and religion. God bless you all and may he give you peace.

Anonymous said...

went to the rehab program that he runs. funny thing they think that their God is the answer to everything and that being a mans man is how all males should be. if you have the slightest differance of opionion they berate and humiliate you. all in the name of "respecting those god puts over you" interesting fact, i went to this rehab and of the 10 guys that stuck out this hellish nightmare. 7 of them went back home and are back on drugs. hmm why is that o yeah. you need people that know what the hell they are doing. not some backwoods bearded guys that havent a clue about the phycological aspect that needs to be delt with. not everything can be solved with "prayer" bunch of bs sorry to burst your bubble. look it up its called seven oaks training center. do your homework before you indorse someone